My 6-Week Personal Battle with the LIE that I Have to EARN My Children’s Love

Sad child not connecting with parent

Because I faced adversity in childhood, including growing up in a home with violence where I didn’t feel or understand love, for a long time, I believed I had to EARN the love of my own children. I now know I don’t. And neither do you, if you, like me, held this belief. The idea […]

Independence vs Freedom from the LIES of CDV

Driving on empty road towards the sun

Some children learn fierce independence growing up with domestic violence. But being independent is not the same as being free from the Lies learned in that home. They learn at an early age to rely exclusively on themselves and no one else Often stuck in a physical environment that is violent, stressful, and painful, these children […]

The Price of Growing Up With Domestic Violence

The majority of adults who grew up with domestic violence feel immense shame and guilt as adults. Yet it can take time before we recognize that the source of our shame can often stem from feeling helpless as a child amid the violence at home, and somehow also responsible for causing it. The good news […]

Who Qualifies As a Child of Domestic Violence?

We are a silent group with no name, one whose numbers could populate an entire continent. It’s natural to doubt whether you were truly a child of domestic violence. In this article I hope to provide you with clarity, as well as some answers for what it means to be a child of domestic violence. […]

Discovering the Vicious Cycle That I Could Now End

As children we are often aware only of what’s happening directly around us. Yet as we become adults we often discover that the way our parents (or guardians) treated us had a lot to do with how they were treated as children. Domestic violence is unfortunately a vicious cycle that is often inherited and passed on from […]

My Story Growing Up With Domestic Violence

When I was 6 years old, my mother slept with a knife under her pillow, and I kept a baseball bat under my bed. It was one of those souvenir bats you might win at an amusement park, but it was the best weapon I could get my hands on. Although we kept these items […]

Domestic Violence and the Lies We Learn

Domestic violence is not a comfortable subject and those of us who grew up living with domestic violence, learned it was easier to stay silent most of the time. However this is one of many lies we learned, now it’s time to embrace the truth. When we do, we set ourselves free of our past, […]